A Press Conference?

Saint Angelina’s baby doctor, Dr. Michel Sussmann, has announced that he will hold a press conference this afternoon in front of the French hospital Angie’s currently holed up in. Angie checked into the hospital on Sunday, because her doctors wanted to watch her ass or something like that.

Angie is currently staying on the fifth floor of The Lenval hospital in Nice, France. They’ve booked several rooms and she’s surrounded by bodyguards. Dramz.

The Associated Press isn’t sure why the hell her baby doctor is holding a press conference? Maybe he’s going to do a song-and-dance for the press? The press conference will be followed by a floor show starring Maddox, followed by a poetry slam competition between Zahara and Pax. Shiloh will appear via satellite where she will just blink and pout a few times for the camera. Gift bags will be passed out and a fireworks finale will end the evening.

Or baby doctor will just announce that the chosen ones are here, so we can all cancel our 4th of July plans to spend the day worshipping our new messiahs.

UPDATE: The press conference was a bore. No floor show and no fireworks. Instead, the baby doctor just told us crap we already know. He said the chosen ones will be here within weeks and St. Angie “is very well, and she’s okay. … Brad and Angelina want everyone to know that everything is going well.” Zzzzzz….