First things first, I think I may have booze poisoning, so please bare (typo and keeping it) with me today. I mean, you know you’re a different kind of drunk when you’re barfing up 100 proof alcohol. Anyway, I had a reason to booze away in Vegas this weekend. I am still suffering at the sudden loss of an American treasure, Mimi La Rue. Obviously, that fugly ass hag, Tori the Hutt, could care less!
Mimi’s sexy body is still warm and Tori is acting like the nation hasn’t suffered a tragedy! I drowned my sorrows in a half-yard while Tori and her creepy ass husband smiled for the paps in Beverly Hills.
I can’t even deal with creepy husband’s painted toe nails right now. This confirms his straight doucheness. No dude that takes it in the ass would ever choose that shade for his toe nails. I mean, is that maroon?! TACKY! He might as well have gotten gold rhinestones on the tips.