Lucky Max

Xtina is in love with her enormous, veiny E-cup chichis and thinks breastfeeding has a lot to do with their current condition. A source told Star Magazine (via Pop Crunch) that she wants to breastfeed baby Max until he turns 2. Why put Max through the horror of having to stick his face in those things? She should just pop another implant in and call it a day.

A source said, “Christina knows lots of women breastfeed until their kids are two years old-she even heard that Demi Moore did it.” Seriously, I think Rumer is still breastfeeding.

I’m sure Max just loves the taste of vodka-silicone-leche. Speaking of vodka, a source claims Xtina’s vodka-filled partying is fucking up her marriage to Bat Boy. The source said, “Jordan’s sick to death of her partying. It’s causing a huge strain on their marriage. He’s at his wits’ end and he doesn’t know what to do.”

Hmmm….he should hide all her red lipsticks. There’s no that way bitch would ever leave the house without at least 10 layers of red paint on her lips.