Taylor Hicks Hits Broadway

June 8, 2008 / Posted by:

If I had Taylor Hicks’ wrinkled turtle peen and Clay Gayken’s man clit both in front of me with a gun to my head, forcing me to suckle on one of them, I’d tell them to pull the trigger and I’d hope for the best.

Is there such thing as a 31-year-old pepaw? Damn, bitch looks like he’s ready for the retirement home and a tall glass of Citrucel. Anyway, American Idol winner Taylor Hicks made his Broadway debut as the Teen Angel in “Grease” last night.

The Soul Patrol was apparently out in full force. What does a member of the Soul Patrol look like anyway? I’m guessing they are in wheelchairs with oxygen tanks in their laps, a hearing aid in each ear and a large bag of peppermints in their fanny packs. They were probably shouting, “WHAT DID HE SAY, EDNA?! BEAUTY SCHOOL WHA?! OOPS! I THINK I JUST WENT ON MYSELF.” through the entire show.

Here’s more pics of Taylor along with the two winners of that crappy ass “Grease” reality show.

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