They Have Sex?!

April 14, 2008 / Posted by:

UsWeekly claims Ashlee Simpson is knocked up! Their “source” confirms that she’s expecting a baby with Pete Wentz. The two announced their engagement recently.

You need to have sex in order to get pregnant! These two just lay in bed giggling and drawing black hearts on each other’s thighs. They might get into heavy petting, but that’s about it.

If Ashlee is knocked up, she’s going to give birth to black eyeliner. It will have its father’s eyes and its mother’s personality.

You know that after Jessica Simpson heard this news, she started frantically poking holes in condoms and replacing her birth control pills with Tic-Tacs. Jessica will not be outdone!

SHARE
Our commenting rules: Don't be racist or bigoted, or post comments like "Who cares?", or have multiple accounts, or repost a comment that was deleted by a mod, or post NSFW pics/videos/GIFs, or go off topic when not in an Open Post, or post paparazzi/event/red carpet pics from photo agencies due to copyright infringement issues. Also, promoting adblockers, your website, or your forum is not allowed. Breaking a rule may result in your Disqus account getting permanently or temporarily banned. New commenters must go through a period of pre-moderation. And some posts may be pre-moderated so it could take a minute for your comment to appear if it's approved. If you have a question or an issue with comments, email: michaelk@dlisted.com

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >