The Miss USA Pageant Is So Weird

April 12, 2008 / Posted by:

Crystle Stewart, a 26-year-old entrepeauner from Texas, was crowned Miss Tranny USA 2008 in Las Vegas last night! Crystle beat out 50 other trannies, soap star rejects and porn stars to the win the crown.

Seriously! I caught some of this mess last night and it felt like I was watching a tranny beauty pageant from the 80s. It was a good thing Christian Siriano was a judge, because these women put the “hot tranny mess” in “hot tranny mess.” I didn’t know that many rhinestones and sequins existed in the world. And the make-up. The make-up! These chicks looked like they were sprayed down by the auto-paint specialists at Maaco. Overload!

Crystle from Texas was the best choice though. I’m sure she’s pretty hot without 10,000 pounds of make-up laying on her face. She also gave the best answer to her “final question,” but that’s not saying much. The girl basically had no competition, because the other girls were pretty much brain dead.

The women also had to wear faux fur during the swimsuit competition. TACKY! This isn’t Miss Mafia Princess!

Below is a clip of the “final question” portion of the show. The panel of judges was actually pretty hot. Heather Mills, Christian Siriano, Kimber from Nip/Tuck, Ken Paves and Hope from Days of Our Lives in one room together! Train wreck!

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