Lisa Marie “I’m not fat, I’m pregnant” Presley is having twins according to Star Magazine. Lisa Marie is 4-months knocked up by husband #4, Michael Lockwood. One of the twins is a boy. She has to name him Elvis or I will never forgive her. Ok, she can name him Jacko too and I’ll be ok with that. I know her heart still belongs to him.
A source told Star, “Michael told me that he and Lisa have been trying to get pregnant for about a year. He also said that they had a sonogram two weeks ago, and [one] baby opened its legs, and they saw something!’ Michael was beaming.” Already opening its legs?! What a tramp.
Seriously though, in vitro babies are everywhere now. I think this is Tom Cruise’s doing. Angelina Jolie’s growing child army is making him nervous, so he’s forcing all the Scientology chicks to carry as many babies as possible. We’ve got a Scientology and Brangelina war on our hands. I’m just waiting to hear that Madonna is knocked up with triplets, because the Kabbalaballaaha skanks must also get in on the action.