Kelly Osbourne performed “Total Eclipse of the Heart” on ITV’s “Guilty Pleasures” this past Saturday. The show asks bitches to perform their favorite guilty pleasure song. Kelly was fucking amazing. She has the voice of a thousand angels wrapped up in a cashmere blanket. I want to burn the song into special earphones and have these earphones surgically implanted into my ears, so I can listen to her song 24 hours a day. I’m just licking your butt lips. She fucking sucked.
They need to ban that song from karaoke bars too. Every time I go to karaoke there is one drunk ass college bitch that has to butcher the fuck out of that song. She’s usually had three too many Long Island Iced teas. It’s even worse when her friends join in and it’s like a drunk slut chorus.