Sarah Larson Is A Genius

Someone needs to tell Sarah Larson that she needs to get knocked up first and then get married. That’s the Hollywood way. It’s been reported that George Clooney has finally asked Sarah to marry him. The two started dating last year when Sarah served Georgie drinks at an event in Las Vegas. Since then she’s quit her $200,000 a year job and is traveling with George full-time. She was a cocktail waitress and making that much money? More like a COCK and tail waitress.

Sources say the two will tie the knot at Georgie’s Lake Como, Italy home this Summer. A source said, “They haven’t made any announcement yet, but there are people in this town who know more than me. They say the couple are already engaged.”

People from Sarah’s past have already started writing about her on a blog called MonsterFresh. They have posted Sarah’s hilarious high school pictures. Unfortunately, there’s nothing really juicy. Sarah seems nice and normal. Dammit! I want to hear the juicy escort stories about how she strapped on for her johns. I know those stories exist!