Danny Noriega Is On The Wrong Show

March 5, 2008 / Posted by:

There’s only word to describe Danny Noriega’s performance on American Idol last night. The word is fierce! I hate that fucking homo word more than I hate my anal warts, but that’s the only word that went through my head while watching him shake his power bottom ass. Fierce is the perfect gay word for him.

I also felt that Danny is on the wrong show. He shouldn’t be on American Idol. He should be on The Pussycat Dolls: Girlicious. Danny put the licious in Girlicious last night with his performance of “Tainted Love.”

Homegirl struts the stage like a 4am hooker looking for her last trick. I don’t even know what to say about his purple streaks. You know he did that shit with Dior hair mascara. I mean, even Paula Abdul’s drunk ass thought they were too much. That’s not a good sign.

Speaking of gayness. Last night was the gayest show of all time. Chikezie sang “All The (Wo)Man That I Need,” Luke Whateverhislastname sang “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” and David “The Stripper” Hernandez sang “It’s All Coming Back To Me Now.” GAY, GAY, GAY!

Lastly, Randy Jackson needs to be FIRED! He doesn’t know shit. After Michael Johns’ performed SIMPLE MINDS’Don’t You Forget About Me,” Randy said, “It was like the Aussie goes home for 80s week. I love that. That was so you. I mean you kind of remind me of Michael Hutchence.” That’s nice and everything, but Michael Hutchence was in INXS not SIMPLE MINDS. DAWG!

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