What Else Is There To Butcher?

March 3, 2008 / Posted by: Michael K

ShockTilYouDrop is reporting that Michael Bay’s production company, Platinum Dunes, plans to remake the 1968 film Rosemary’s Baby. Platinum Dunes is in talks to update the Roman Polanski film. The original movie was based on an Ira Levin novel and it starred Mia Farrow, John Cassavetes and Ruth Gordon.

Platinum Dunes is also working on the remakes of Nightmare on Elm Street, The Birds and Friday the 13th. They should change their name to The Butcher House.

We know how this is going to play. Jessica Alba, ScarJo or Keira Knightley will play Rosemary. Hayden Christensen, Ryan Phillipe or Chris Kline will play Guy. They will get some cheesy band like Good Charlotte to do a title theme. They will fill that shit with a ton of pathetic CGI effects. Fuck, they might as well get a big name to play the baby. I’m thinking Jack Nicholson.

Stop the madness! Can’t they remake shit that actually needs help? Howard the Duck maybe? Yeah, what am I talking about? That movie is perfect just the way it is.

VIA Coming Soon

Tags: Dumbasses, Film, Gross, Hot Slut of the Day, Jude Law, Uncomfortable

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