Penny Is Going Down

February 29, 2008 / Posted by:

Page Six reports that things are getting mighty serious between Javier Bardem and Penny Cruz. Javier flew his family in from Spain to meet Penny and attend the Oscars. Penny partied with Javier’s hot mom (above) and wasn’t afraid to feel up her man in front of the family.

A source said, “He took Penelope for a spin on the dance floor in front of all his family. It’s getting pretty serious.” This story is full of hurtful lies. Javier would never do this to me. Besides just because you dirty dance with a bitch in front of your family, doesn’t mean you’re going to share your social security number with them. Penny needs to go away and suck on Salma Hayek’s chichis, because that’s what she really wants in life.

I hope that Penny doesn’t screw Javier over or there’s going to be hell to pay. Look at Javier’s mother. She may be all smiles and roses on the outside, but the woman looks like she could beat the hell out of a bitch with a fallen tree branch. My abuelita used to pull branches off of trees in the backyard to beat us with. I never understood this, because she could easily beat us with a broom or something, but for some reason she really loved hitting us with fresh tree branches. She was natural like that.

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