Sixth-Grade SLUT!!!!

February 28, 2008 / Posted by:

Jessica Alba wrote an essay for Ellyn Spragins’ upcoming book of essays from female celebrities. Oh and by”wrote” I mean she probably had someone else do it while she shouting obscenities at them and talking about her brown baby.

Jessica said that in the sixth-grade she had big boobs and because of that the principal and some PTA moms deemed her a “slut.” I don’t see a problem? Where I come from that’s a compliment. It’s better than being called “caca pants” by your classmates. I’ll tell you the story sometime over canapes and Hennessey.

She went on to say, “Boys are awful. They are made of nothing but hormones until they’re about 20 or 21 . . . It’s fun to have a crush, but don’t think it’s forever . . . And use birth control and condoms, please.

Now…I’m not one to judge (you can wipe the coffee off your computer screen, I really did say that, but I didn’t mean it), but Jessica Alba is telling people to use birth control and condoms? This coming from a woman who is knocked up by a man that has allegedly cheated on her ass several times? That’s rich! Oh and Jessica, boys are also made of snips, snails and puppy dog tails! Didn’t you learn anything in school? Obviously not, because you were too busy being a sixth-grade slut!

Source: Page Six

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