Clay Gayken Keeps His Sex Drive In Check

In an interview with New York Magazine, Clay Gayken talks about his new life in NYC. Clay is currently starring on Broadway in “Spamalot.” Gayken said he doesn’t plan on going to clubs or bars. She said, “The only reason people go to bars is to get drunk and have sex. To me, bars are what hell is like.” Drunk and having sex is hell?! Sounds like heaven to me. What kind of gay is Clay?!

Clay said that he isn’t dating anyone and only spends time with “his dogs.” I think that’s code word for dildo.

He said, “I just don’t have an interest in … any of that at all. I have got too much on my plate. I’d rather focus on one thing and do that when I can devote time to it, and right now, I just don’t have any desire.” When asked if he has any sort of sexual urges, he says, “Ah think maybe I don’t! I mean, not really. I’ve just kind of shut it off, maybe. Is that bad?”

The writer also gets into the culture of the Claymate. The box office person at “Spamalot” even warned the writer that they scream like teenage girls, but are middle-aged woman.

I feel sort of bad for Gayken, but then I picture him having sex and my drive is instantly shut off. Thinking of Gayken doing sexy times makes me want to go to church and knit something. Hey, they should play Gayken videos in High School. The teen pregnancy levels would plummet.

Who needs sex when you’re Clay Aiken anyway? I’m sure the Claymates are having enough sex for him. They probably sell Clay voodoo dolls in the underground Claymate groups. They probably rub his vodoo doll all over their middle-aged private parts while listening to his cover version of “Here You Come Again.”