Last night was the premiere of “Celebrity Rehab” on Vh1. That shit was depressing as hell. First of all, Jeff Conaway is a royal fucking mess. I felt like I was on drugs just watching him. I need rehab from watching his display. He is a hardcore addict and I felt his pain. Jeff showed up to Dr. Drew’s clinic already high on $1,000 worth of prescription pills. Later in the episode he had some sort of seizure and is rushed to the hospital. That’s the real shit right there.
Jeff wasn’t the only “celebrity” to show up loaded. Porn star and future President of the United States, Mary Carey, showed up drunk and baring gifts. Mary brought her dildos, porn videos and strap-ons. Bitch wanted to fuck the dude from CrazyTown, but they took away all her toys. No dildos, booze, drugs or sex in rehab. Damn, that’s harsh.
The rest of the cast included Chyna, Gitte, the little girl from Family Matters, Daniel Baldwin and Jessica Sierra. We all know what happened to her ass.
This show is going to get interesting. Honestly, I’m only tuning in to see Dr. Drew’s hot ass each week. Well, that and Mary Carey trying to do her best Mariah Carey impersonation. She sort of looks like her!