September 4, 2007 / Posted by: Michael K
Quick! Somebody dip Paris Hilton's coochie in acid or something! The world's safety is at stake! Paris Hilton told Elle UK that she wants to have a baby next year. Um Paris…in case you haven't heard Nicole Richie already beat you to the punch.
Paris said, "I want kids next year, so I've got to get my body ready."
I'd love to see the look on the journalist's face when she said that. I would have to cut a hole in my pants with my nails to pinch my balls, so I wouldn't bust out in laughter.
Getting her body ready?! What's to get ready. Bitch is already a sperm bank! She has enough sperm inside her to create an army. An army of WONKIES. It's like "It's A Small World" up in her body. So many different kinds of sperm. All shapes and all sizes and I bet you they sing that same song!
A source also said that Paris is definitely feeling maternal. "Paris told me, 'I want lots of babies and a more simple life away from the celebrity spotlight. I did a lot of soul-searching about my partying and then I heard Nicole was pregnant and I decided it's time for me to grow up and take responsibility – and the best way to do that is to become a mother.' "
Britney Spears probably put those thoughts in her head, so somebody else's poor skills could take the heat off of her.
Source: Female First