The world revealed the new James Bond at tonight’s Casino Royale premiere in London. Daniel Craig and his fug face showed up. All I want to know is if the stick is big. He should’ve shown up with a bag over his head and his pants around his ankles. I mean really, talk about selfish! The English glitterati or something were out in full force.
Daniel brought his beautiful girlfriend! Eva Green, the newest Bond girl, showed up looking like an Eastern European, tranny madam.
Chris Cornell, who sings the painful theme song and his wife showed up in the midst of death threats. Shirley Bassey showed the young hoes how it’s really done. Elton John and David Furnish got even gayer, as if that’s possible.